The value of my time and integrity

I learned something about myself yesterday.

Over the summer I was very broke, taking on extra jobs to make some money. My grandparents were helping me with bills, but I still needed to feel like I was making a contribution.  I started cocktail waitressing poker nights and cleaning houses.  I have an incredible gift for making people feel welcome and at home, and an even greater gift for creating a warm and inviting energy in people's homes, through organization and cleaning.

I started charging $12 an hour, but quickly found I felt my time was worth more.

Shortly after school started, I realized the poker nights were not bringing in enough money per hour. *anyone who has been a server/bartender, as I have, knows that $20 an hour should be a good minimum.*

I could make $20 an hour easily by giving massages to men sitting at the table. I have a gift for massage as well, since I know my fair share of back pain. After my fourth dislocation of my left shoulder, I decided it wasn't in my best interests to put that strain on my body. I vowed not to give any more massages at poker nights, and it became extremely apparent where I was making the most money.

There was a particular poker night host, we will call him Mo, who took quite a liking to what I was able to do with his place (cleaning/ambiance wise) and the way I made his guests feel.  One day I suggested to him that each poker player contribute $5 on a night that I work, in order to bring the money up to par.  He said, "good idea, but no thanks. Just rest your shoulder."

Ok swell! I just won't work anymore poker nights.
Well, yesterday, Mo texted me. He asked if I could help him with his new apartment . He wanted it cleaned before he moved in. Said he didn't figure it would take me more than three hours. Three hours sounded reasonable because that's about how long I spent cleaning his past apartment. I took a leap of faith in the value of my time. Instead of $36 for three hours, I threw out $50. I said, "I can do it for $50, top to bottom, plus supplies." Realizing this was more than I'd asked for in the past, he hesitated before agreeing.

I picked up supplies (30 minutes and $70), went to his hotel, picked up the key, and then drove to the new apartment.

When I walked inside I was a little unnerved. This place was dilapidated and in need of SErious TLC.  I got to work. It was 6pm. About 2 hours in I realized I was going to need more magic erasers for the tub and let him know. He came by at 9 to get the key and give me money. I wasn't done yet but I told him I'd lock up behind me when I was done. "70 for supplies."  He handed me $60 and told me he'd have to owe me ten.  I asked, what about the labor? He looked confused so I quickly clarified.  "I told you I'd clean it for 50 plus the cost of supplies. I spent 70 on supplies." His response? "What did you buy?!"  He sounded indignant and annoyed.  This man had no concept of the transitioning that was happening upstairs.  I tried not to show my frustration, as this was the ThiRD instance of him not understanding the value of my time.
Doesn't this man know?  I could be saving the world right now! I could be studying for my test on Monday or exercising! I don't HAVE to clean his house!!!

I went back upstairs and for a millisecond, wanted to leave everything a mess and walk out. $50 and I'd spent three hours there. dOnE. Except, the familiar tug of my integrity pulled at my heart.

I put on some music and decided even though my hourly wage was dropping with every push of the mop and every squirt of windex, that apartment was going to look absolutely stunning by the time I left, no questions asked.

Fast forward another hour and 45 minutes later. The apartment has gone from dilapidated to charming. The wood floors are conditioned. The bath tub looks brand new.  My hourly wage is officially $10.52 not including gas or the time it took me to shop for supplies. I looked around and thought...I have really outdone myself.

I realized two things.  The first: my integrity won't allow me to do a job half assed.  This is important because when creating price structures for my future business, I know now, I will not be able to justify charging a lower wage and only putting in X amount of effort. My integrity will push me to always give 110%, so I need to charge accordingly.

The second: why do I love the before and after of houses that I put my energy in to? I have always been a sucker for potential. I see it in people all the time. I used to practically kill myself trying to help them see it or create a desire to reach it. A house can't choose. I can bring a house to its potential and it can't fight back. It's definitely a control issue. And so now I say to myself....LET iT GO Alicia!!!!!!

Last note about Mo - I very tactfully told him I wasn't cleaning houses anymore.
I asked him today if he'd seen it and he said "looks good"
I said "it doesn't look good, it looks phenomenal."